Hi everyone. Time for the last newsletter already!!!! We’ve been having some rocking good weather for jumping on your bike. It’s not long until daylight savings as well. The extra light will be perfect for hooning out to Te Miro or the Pukete Tracks and squeezing in a ride before dinner.

Thanks to all those who came along for the WUMBAT MISSION. We did all sorts of things including playing around in the mud at Atiamuri, and massacring each other in the paintball game. We even developed some useful tips for a leisurely, sedate luge ride on the beautiful scenic route …never go luging with Zane!!! If you do go luging do not ram each others’ carts, roll over steep banks or flip each other over at high speeds. Do not pull large amounts of dirt and big rocks onto the track. Do not gouge ragged holes in the side of carts. Do not descend in-groups of 20. Do not leave patches of skin on the track. If you want tips for a, fun, violent, kamikaze luge run, disregard all of the above precautions. (P.S. We saw some other people doing these sorts of things. It wasn’t us. You can’t prove anything.)

On to bigger and better things…We have planned weekend rides until October 23^rd but then exams kick in, so spontaneous trips are the go. To help you link up with some riding buddies and other people who can show you their favourite tracks, we’ve stuck in the club phone list. There was supposed to be a copy in the last newsletter but Andy’s dog ate it. It’s here this time so give each other a ring, especially over the summer, and organise some rides. Because we’re a Uni club, we all go our separate ways when classes finish for the year, and then start back up on Clubs Day in March.

The last planned ride to Thompsons Track somehow mutated into a Te Miro ride. (We are fully flexible to change plans to where everyone wants to go. Just tell us what you want.) Nine people turned out to sample some new tracks including The Terminator, built by Gary (while he was supposed to be recovering from a broken collarbone.) Conditions were perfect. = Big grins all around. Stu also managed to unexpectedly hug a tree whilst travelling at something close to light speed. Let’s just call it ‘Warp Factor Lynch Mob’.

Hope to see you all on the next few rides. All fitness levels and skill levels are welcome. We just want to see you on your bikes! If you want to find out more about a planned ride, or let us know that you’re keen, just give someone on the committee a ring. See you soon!!

This is a ride with ancient folklore history attached to it. Back in the dim dark days of 96 when goblins and sorcerers ruled the University, there emerged three brave worriers. Andrew "fearless" Knudsen, Zane "smell me and ye shall perish" Snooks and Jhono "I am the president, I have power" Personthing. These merciless worriers joined limbs around the ‘round table/wheel’ under the name of Wumbats. They did venture with strength and courage to the merciful ranges that runs down from the Coromandel peninsula. The track was called Wires and it was supposed to be fun. Although these fearless worriers have never been seen again some say they still exist. Sometimes late at night when the wind blows you can still here the cry of the Snook lad playing mean tricks on Knudsen and Ono.

Anyway since then not a lot of Wumbats have got there shit together and ridden the Wires again, therefore in the spirit of barbarianism we invite you to venture with us on this journey of fun and frivolousness. Do you accept this challenge?

Vegas, Rotorua, Rotovegas, Rottenrua, tourist town, the big R, home, The Lake district, Redwoods, Chris’s place, thermal wonderland, culture capital of N Z, Zippy town, that luge place, MTB heaven, Mountain bike geeksville, smellytown. These are just some of the names of the place in our neighbourhood, in our neighbourhood. Anyway there will be special Wumbat points allocated to anyone who can come up with thirteen thousand two hundred and twenty more names that describe Rotorua. Entries will only be accepted on the ride so you will all have to come to be in to win. Can you say win.

Yes this is a ride around Hamilton. This means two things. You won’t have to spend time travelling and you won’t have to spend money travelling. I you were foolish enough to believe that Hamilton was boring for riding than you will be pleasantly amused to find many many interesting places to ride. The key to this rides success is that we have asked gurus of the area to show us there favourite, secret spots for and we are going to the recently made MTB area up near Te Rapa.

Oct 8^th Last Day off term - Yee ha!

Oct 9^th "Day night thriller" in Taupo. A teams race that starts at noon goes to midnight. All good. Ask Sheryl for more info.

Te Miro roughly translated through Hebrew to Japanese, back to Hebrew and through Spanish and finally through a blender back to English means "Some nice mountain bike riding with lots and lots of interesting single track everywhere through the forest and a big lake and up a hill and down even more hills than you went up and real close to Hamilton and nice sunny day and no pigs allowed in the dormitories" Funny that isn’t it.

A common misconception is that the name ‘Luck at last’ came from a gold mining find. Common Wumbat mythology says otherwise. We believe the name sprung from this being the first time Daniel Sargison Lynch rode a bycicle. Instantly Dan had luck by using his first ever bike (22 inches of travel) to pull a wheelie at 136 miles per hour down a sheer cliff and thus avoiding a speeding fine because he was only on 1 wheel therefore not classified as a vehicular device.

Despite this obviously foolish folk tail I would like to extend a warm and hairy invitation on behalf of Patrick to you to join us on this lovely ride.

The guys and gals in the know are:

Sheryl Macleod Ph 855 9684

Vice President

Jarrod Ho Ph 856 0299

Andrew Sheerin Ph 856 6340

Martyn Simons Ph 856 8355

Rachel Ph 855 9684

Patrick McLaughin Ph 824 6181

*******NEWSFLASH********

The Kennet Bros.’ Awesome little book of mountain bike rides is coming out in a new edition with all-new tracks. Tracks that have been closed or logged will be omitted, and all the ones people have been busy building will be featured. It is due out on Nov 1^st. To contact the authors, check out their website: www.mountainbike.co.nz , this site has everything you ever wanted to know about MTBing.

(38 Powells Rd) BBQ to mark the end of the Uni year and celebrate the up and coming great summer of MTBing. Bring a plate (with food on it) sausages will be provided, BYO steak, burgers, onions. A reasonable amount of drinks will be provided (Yes that means alcohol), but you'll need more to get you to town on a Tuesday.

No dry and formal annual general meeting here, huge gathering of MTBikers, mostly socialising,

mostly drinking, 7.30pm 38 Powells road don't forget. Feel free to nominate someone for "something" of the year award, eg most improved, most munted, best dismount, biggest try hard, 99 techhead, well you get the drift.

Mongoose Day-Night Thriller Oct 9^th Taupo

Missed out on the Moonride? Always wanted to try night-riding? The Mongoose Day-Night Thriller is at Taupo on the 9th of October. It is a five person lap race operating for twelve hours, from noon to midnight, so teams only need six hours of battery power. It is for everyone from recreational day riders to night riding adrenaline junkies. There is still time to sort yourselves out some cheap lights. Jarrod Ho and Andrew Knudsen have both made their own night lights a lot cheaper than what you can buy. Bend their ears to find out how they did it. Anyone keen? Here’s the info on the event…

The course is 9km or 30 minutes in length which includes fast pine needle covered bush roads connected by single track, a stream crossing, a fast downhill section and of course a solid hill climb, something for all taste buds. Each team is allocated a team site of 10m X 5m at DEERWORLD to erect your tent and park two vehicles. The track weaves among the team sites so you will see a constant stream of cyclists.

SPOT PRIZES GALORE - over $10,000 worth including a great Mongoose bike.

$45 per rider which includes free tea/coffee, a meal voucher at Deerworld, first-aid and rescue support and a certificate. Entries are limited and close on 20 September 1999. Call the Event Director, Murray Fleming ph: (07) 3780455 fax: (07)3782028 or e-mail on eventpro@reap.org.nz

Blazing Saddles. Oct 24^th Rotorua

This is a cool event with heaps of socialising and an awesome, fun, non-competitive atmosphere. It is organised by the Rotorua Club. It will include 1 hour of short XC laps, 2 downhill courses and a dual slalom. You must use the same bike for all events. It’s $20 to enter and entry forms are at bike shops. Be there …or don’t be.

The carpark was empty with no-one around and I was wondering where on earth every one was on such a fine and sunny day. But alas they turned up (late - in typical WUMBAT fashion) so the day began. Five people, five bikes, and a book on weird and wonderful warcraft piled into the mighty Subaru. Zane, Andrew, Jen and Aaron (the troops) set off to do the widow maker, Jack and Jill and the Alien. The riding was awesome (especially since I was riding my new baby) and the weather was superb. We even sunbathed for a bit and ate peanut butter for lunch in amongst our riding adventures. Neil the fifth member of the mission decided to run the tracks - not a real mountain biker I tell you. But we'll forgive him for not being hard like the rest of us!

The day ended with ice cream (as every ride with Zane always does). Two words for ya - ripped off - so don't go to the Hillcrest dairy for ice cream, despite the fact that they boast 16 flavors

Jen

From the start we were separated into two groups, the hard and the not so hard (Jarrod & Jen) who decided the circuit track around the domain was enough of a challenge were the rest had our sights firmly set on the trig. It wasn't long before the old question was being asked "Why are we doing this?" as the road got steeper. I am sure that is what Martyn was thinking, riding a Keewee down hill bike.

At the top a great view was denied us by passing cloud. Back down to the entry of the 'walking track' saw our first single track and more pushing, then down steep rocky single track. Young Lester lapping it up and the rest of us just hanging on. Martyn came to grief cutting his knee, another battle scar. So we made a beeline for the road, and the end of another great ride.

Zane and Andrew had commandeered the ride and decided to ride up the road side instead of the single track (good choice). The hills on the road were a gut buster without the single track. Arriving at the toll booth we parted with our fare and after riveting conversation on Treaty issues we continued up. Lunch at the craters edge and talk about the sight of snow in the distance, which of course was were the wind was coming from.

Zane keeping up group moral with his witty lines, we arrived at the spot - the shingle decent. I was a little apprehensive, but at the bottom I was looking for any decent which had shingle on it, which meant we took the long way out of the crater. Racing down the road to blow out any remaining cobwebs and put a wobble in my back wheel, on one of the many water bars.

This is a story about a Wumbat ride. The ride is called Woodhill Forest. In summary we had fun. We were Patrick, Lynchmob (Dan and Stu) and Neil. Daniel let me play on Rolly toys. Daniel was riding his Mountain Cycles mobile couch. Patrick has a nice dual suspension bike. Stu is a blur. We rode up and down. We played in the sand. We did not make sand castles. I cried. Dan and Stu did these jumps real high and then landed on the down ramps. I tried not to show that I was impressed. Then we had some spaghetti. The spaghetti was long and went jaggedly around. I fell in my spaghetti. I had tomato sauce over myself. The spaghetti was only just cooked. But it was nice. By the end of the spaghetti we were full up but we all agreed that one day we would be back to dine on the spaghetti track once more.

Once again my little bit of the newsletter will be short and sweet (just like me). We only have five weeks left of semester - yippie, so that means only a few more weeks of organised WUMBATS rides. So if you haven't been out for a while, or even if you have, dust off that bike and park your butt on it. You'll be amazed at how well a good ride will blow out the cob-webs and de-stress that burnt out brain of yours. Hope to see you all out on the tracks for the last few rides.

Now if you thought mountain biking was painful check this out (brace yourselves boys!).

(This is taken from the latest edition of FHM)

When I was studying in Ireland , I took up rugby. As my first season wore on , the lads and I were eventually scheduled to play a team which had a reputation for violent play . Considering that we weren't the most talented outfit to have ever taken the field, we decided to accept the challenge with a " do or die " attitude, hoping things would eventually swing our way .

They didn't and to make matters worse our star player dislocated his hip after a particularly ferocious tackle. He was clearly in a lot of pain, so we all stood back to which the medic who, in one swift movement, managed to slot the hip back into its socket .

Then Alan began a long blood curdling scream . To our horror, we realised that one of his testicles had also been jammed into the socket and was now firmly held in the place by the hip .

Incidentally , Alan managed to rip a vocal chord with his screaming .

OOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!

Manitou SX E Suspension Forks. Brand new, black, never used. Twin-piston-chamber. 3 inches travel. Retail $569 Will sell $350. Ring Sheryl 8559684

Well, it seems to be all over now doesn't it.

Not, its only just starting. For those of you who are hanging around in Hamilton over the summer here a list of all Wumbats. Wanna go for a ride, just throw a dart and call the person who it lands on, they're bound to be itching to get out and go for a decent ride.

Have a great summer and we'll see ya all back here next year. Providing we all survive Y2K.

Not the millennium bug, just new years night.